The Shepherd, May 2007

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§ 142.  The Mysterion of Matrimony.  Matrimony is the mysterion (sacrament) in which voluntarily the groom and bride make their mutual vows of matrimonial faithfulness before the priest and the Church, in which their marital union is blessed as an image of the union of Christ with the Church, and in which they beseech the blessing of living together in chaste concord, and that they might be granted the blessing of having children and bringing them up.  The order of the service falls into two distinct parts:  the betrothal and the crowning. 

Before the start of the service, the priest blesses the couple marrying and gives them each a lighted candle, as a sign of their joy and of the hope that, through the kindheartedness of God, their life too will be joyous and illumined. 

The betrothal begins with the priestly exclamation, “Blessed is our God….”  The Great Litany follows with added petitions for the couple: “that they be granted children for the continuation of their line,” “that He send down upon them perfect and peaceful love, and Divine succour,” “that they be kept in concord and steadfast faith,”  that they be blessed with a blameless life,”  “that they be granted an honourable marriage.”  Then the priest reads a prayer, “O Eternal God, Who has brought into unity those who were sundered… Who didst bless Isaac and Rebecca and didst make them heirs of Thy promise: Bless also these Thy  servants….”  He continues: “O Lord our God, Who hast espoused the Church as a pure virgin… bless this betrothal and unite and maintain these Thy servants in peace and concord.”   To signify the fact that the union between the groom and the bride is to be unbreakable and lifelong, he gives them rings.  He places the bride’s ring on the groom’s finger, and the groom’s ring on the bride’s.  The couple then themselves exchange them, usually three times, so that they end by wearing their own rings.  This signifies that they are entering into this marriage of their own free will.  [A footnote here reads:]  According to Church custom, the ring for the groom is gold, and that for the bride is silver.  The gold signifies the man’s leading rôle in their married life, like the sun having pre-eminence over the moon.  The distinction between the two rings also indicates that the groom will always be prepared to use his superior strength to support his wife, as the weaker member, and that the bride will always be prepared to accept his support. [In fact, more often than not, nowadays both the bridal pair wear gold rings.  Perhaps today, the superior strength of men is not so evident! - ed.]   Then follows a long prayer in which we ask that their pledged union may be confirmed and receive the Lord’s blessing, and in which it is made clear that the pledge is made sure by the exchange of rings.  Then follows a threefold litany in which the Sovereign is prayed for and all the brethren [the Christian community].  This shows that a marriage is not simply a private agreement, but is for the wellbeing of the state and the wider community. [In fact this litany appears to be omitted nowadays].

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